Fence Posts and Strongholds

Last weekend, I (along with some help from my sons) spent several hours replacing 2 fence posts that had blown down in the winds that hit the week after Christmas. This is after having to replace 3 others this summer. All of them suffered from the same problem–they were set in concrete by the company that initially installed the fence.

I used to think that it makes perfect sense to set wooden fence posts in concrete…that is, until I had to replace one. What happens is that over time, the wood that sits within the concrete gets wet and begins to deteriorate. Eventually a strong wind or someone leaning on it causes the wood to snap, and you are left with the unenviable job of having to  dig out the concrete in order to replace the post. Not fun.

For each post, we spent hours with a chisel and a concrete breaking rod I borrowed from a neighbor, trying to break the concrete slab, piece by piece in order to get it out of the ground. (Most of the posts were not in a place where we could back up a truck and try to pull it out–so we were left chiseling.)

As I was working on digging out these posts, I realized that this same sort of thing often happens in our spiritual lives…with lies we believe. These lies may be a response to a hurt or to a critical statement someone makes to us as a child. In that moment, we start to believe something that isn’t true…about us or about God. And that lie gets set in concrete in our soul.

The Bible has a word for this. It calls it a “stronghold.” Paul talks about it in 2 Corinthians 10:4-5 “The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds.” This word refers to a fortress, a castle that is not easily penetrated. It speaks of a way of thinking that has been set in concrete. It has become such a strong influence but we hardly even know its there. It’s a lie we are believing.

God has been uncovering all sorts of these lies in my own soul within the past several months. For instance, I have long believed that I have to perform well in order for anyone to like me or to want to be with me. Notice what is at the root of this lie–a self hatred that is masked by drivenness and striving.

Now this lie has all sorts of corollaries that will manifest themselves in my life.  Recently I realized that I have believed that as a leader, I have to try and make sure that everyone is pleased with decisions I make. Talk about an instant pathway to stress and discouragement.

These lies are like background music in our lives, constantly playing so we don’t even notice it consciously. But the impact is huge. We end up carrying a weight of ‘ought to’s’ and “shoulds’ that are like a slow leak in our soul. It robs us of joy, of sleep, or deep relationships.

In my next post, I will talk about how we break these lies. But before we go there, I think it would be well worth your time to go before the Lord and to ask Him, what lies am I believing–about You, about me? One great place to begin looking for these strongholds is in those areas of negative emotions in our lives–fear, insecurity, stress, anger, discouragement. In those areas, prayerfully ask God, what is at the root of this emotion? What am I believing when these emotions begin to surface?

Happy digging!

New Year Reflections

One of the things I love about News Years Day is that it encourages us to do two things: To reflect upon the past year and to refocus for the coming year. Both of those are so critically important things to do and yet we are rarely intentional about it…except on New Years Day. While we may ignore it, there is I believe within us a prompting–a longing– to stop and look both of those directions.

For me, I took some time yesterday to reflect upon the past year. It has been a year filled with loss, with change, with blessing and with challenges. I thought about my mom and how significant a person she was in my life and how much I miss her. I thought about some of the other relationship transitions that have occurred this past year–some exceedingly painful.

I thought about how in my lowest of lows, God was opening my heart to experience Him more deeply–in the midst of my weakness. Even though this is a huge life theme for me, I still need to be reminded of it frequently. This past year was one of those seasons where God reminded me of His desire for me to live out of a place of absolute rest in His love. Oh, how I wish I would fully learn that lesson!

My daughter, Erin, started college–which was so much harder than I anticipated. I had heard parents talk about the tears and sadness they felt as they drove away from the dorm after moving their child in, but no one warned me about the emptiness in the house that you experience for weeks and weeks after that.

My son, Joel, became an Eagle scout–and I was so proud of his discipline and hard work in reaching that milestone.

My son Caleb had his first worship leading experience–doing guitar and vocal. How fun it was to be led into God’s presence by my 14 year old son. 

My ten year old son,  Joshua, and I had a relational breakthrough a few months ago. Up to that point, our relationship had at times been strained–some weird ‘oil and water’ chemistry between us. But God did something in my heart and our relationship has completely changed for the better. 

Those are just a few of my reflections on this past year. Lots to be thankful for. God is so faithful, even…and perhaps especially…in times of difficulty and challenge. I’m thankful for His presence in my life and am excited to move forward into the coming year with a deepening awareness of my need and His incredible sufficiency.

Happy New Year!

 

 

 

One More Story

Here’s one more story that was sent to me:

After 35 years of sincere, and even zealous Christianity (but one fouled with a view that i had the right to addiction and disobedience), the whole thing crashed big-time (family, job, freedom, health, finances, etc. all ruined). And from childhood, i had literally lived in a state of high-anxiety, stress, emotional pain, and abject fear of eternity. Everything about life was hard; like swimming through molasses.

Then, about 7 November 2010, I went through a 35-day catharsis at an addiction recovery program called The Colony of Mercy at America’s Keswick.  1st was true and ABSOLUTE surrender to Him, followed by an intense period of emotional pain and ending with a dreadful / wonderful vision of actually being killed, but somehow staying alive.   Upon talking to the chaplain later about the vision, he said,  “you know… Keswick is like an elephant graveyard.  People come here to die.  They just don’t know it.”  Oh my… what?

 his started an incredible 40-day period of fasting and prayer.  It was as if God took the prior 35 years of my stumbling walk with Him, and pulled all of that out of the savings account He had created at the beginning of my walk with Him back in 1974 – and poured it back into me, with interest added!

As I back-filled my abandoned self-identity with what the Bible says i am in Christ (about 80+ things right?), all the pain, fear, doubt, anxiety – ALL of it – went away. He did it. As i abide right now (“now”), in Him, there is absolutely no fear, no pain, no doubt, no worry, no anxiety… There is only Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness, and even self-control.   What’s up with that?

 What happened to me?  i’m was not trying to over-intellectualize here. i was (and am still) having some off-the-hook experiences with this too.  Dreams, visions, sights, sounds, understandings, empowerment (all – so far – aligned with Scripture)… This was wonderful, but really weird, and definitely not part of my religious background.

Then, a beautiful brother, an author; one with a testimony worth listening to – and a proven track record – sent me this note:

My Dear Brother,

Laying aside the possibility that you are enjoying the wonders of having gone stark raving mad, I would surmise that you have come to understand that you are utterly one with Christ.

One thing is certain, which ever case it may be, do not attempt to understand. Oneness with the Lord is inexplicable. Further, do not look for a cure!

A delighted brother, (name)

 

Wow.  Surely it’s true.  For believers, Jesus is in us.  But it is just as true that we are in Him.

Telling Our Stories Part 2

Here are some more great stories of God’s work in people’s lives:

I was raised in a Christian home. I had some problems and joined the service at 17 years old. After my discharge I returned home. I got into motorcycles, alcohol and drugs. When I was 33 years old I’d lost everything. I remember saying where is that inner peace people talk about? Well, things started happening, I met the love of my life(31 years now married). We started going to church with my parents, after 2 months we both were saved.
 

The Lord delivered us from alcohol and drugs. I have had some set backs through the years, but God and my wife have remained faithful and forgave me. God has blessed us with a business, home and friends. I’ve seen God work in our lives in so many ways that I could write pages of his blessings.  I know for sure God is the answer to all your needs.

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I was raised in a Christian family that had been in the church for generations I became a Christian at the age of six. When I was nine my family was torn apart by a girl that I thought was a friend who told a vicious  lie about one of my parents. My sisters and I were put in foster care and it took three years for my family to be reconciled. After that I went into a downward spiral after years of every vile activity you can think of and a life threatening disease that I still suffer from, I was at the end of my self. I recommitted my life to the lord three years ago and though I am not completely healed yet I have complete faith that God will heal my body like he healed my heart and soul.

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I have always believed in God, but I haven’t always known Him. I fell through the world’s open doors — giving pieces of myself to nameless boys, drowning in alcohol’s carelessness, locking my heart away with guilt and fear. I wanted God, but not enough.

And, sometimes, I still don’t. I continually have to choose the open arms of my Father. But I do it because I know I need Him. He cleanses me with grace and fills me with unconditional love. He takes my heart and bestows worth that can’t compare.

My God calls me as His own.

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I was convinced that a person’s faith was strictly the result of where they lived.  If the Christians I knew lived inIndia, they would be Hindus. 

They got me to go to a meeting where I heard the Gospel: I was separated from God, but in his love for me he sent his Son to pay what I deserve- death.  I understood that Christianity is a person, not a rule book, and I put my trust in Jesus.

 Now I know I am far more than my environment.  I was created by God for fellowship with him, the result being hope that is independent of circumstances.

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My story began when I was around 23 years old.  I was a very troubled individual.  I had no care about my sins and my main goal was to survive and have fun doing it.  I had a girlfriend (Who is my wife now) that I was constantly mean too verbally and unfaithfully.  I had always been told about God, but never really cared about it per say.  I lived my life and that was all I needed.  It was one day when my wife (girlfriend at the time) had had enough of my hurtful mentality and said no more.  At the time I said to my self ol’ well I will just get another girlfriend.  Not more than a few days later I hurt for her something overcame my heart and I had realized what I was missing.  I begged her to come back to me over and over, but she refused. 

At the time my mentor who was a preacher, and was very subtly talking to me about scriptures and living in sin.  Which at that time I kept blowing him off saying I hate the Bible and how contradicting it is I can’t stand reading. This mentor and I grew very close and I found myself hanging out with him more and more listening to his advice on this girl I let slip through my fingers.  He told me “go to church” show her a change; don’t just say you are changed.  So I did, and found myself going more and more. 

Later I talked to my mentor and said ‘I am ready to get baptized again” I wanted to show everyone that I truly believed Jesus had died for me.  So I got baptized and cried uncontrollably asking God to come into my heart and make me new.  Long story short, my girlfriend saw the change in me and decided to give me another chance. We have now been married for 5 years and have three little boys.  I still to this day struggle with all the worldly things and still rarely read the bible, but I truly know that God is active in our lives and has washed us clean through his son Jesus Christ.   Every day I still feel like I am getting closer to him in every way.

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I was raised a Catholic and early in my childhood my parents were excommunicated after it was discovered they were divorced and remarried. For fifty years I was broken, believing in Jesus, without ever really truly knowing why. Catholicism, a religion of man, had wrongfully taught me that the only pathway into heaven was through my good deeds, what I did, and my steadfast adherence to their religious dogma. In knowing the Gospel, I now genuinely and deeply love Jesus; heaven is totally ours because of what he did on the cross through our magnificent and loving Father in heaven.

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How about yours? Feel free to email it to mystory@cccgreeley.org.

 

Telling Our Stories

This past weekend, I spoke to our congregation about the power of telling our stories. The message of the gospel is embodied in our own personal experience with Jesus. When we are able to share that with people, it is a powerful thing. 

In the message, I challenged all of us to write our story in 100 words or less. I added a challenge for anyone willing to email me their story, and I would post it on this blog–as a way for us to be encouraged by each other’s stories.

Here are a few of those stories, each reminding us what an incredible Savior we have:

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 Looking for love in all the wrong places. . .that was me.  Because of my childhood sexual abuse I was wounded and confused.  I was loved in one way and betrayed in another.

 As a teenager and young adult I looked to people (men) to fill my emptiness and give me the love I desired.  That didn’t work.  I became depressed and suicidal.  One day I cried out to God and prayed, “Please help me”.  That very day he answered and came to my rescue.  He sent a total stranger to share with me the good news of Jesus Christ…the One who could fill me with unconditional love and forgiveness.  After I prayed the prayer of salvation, He lifted the heavy yoke of despair and filled me with His love which I so desperately longed for.

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 I skipped today. 

 That’s significant because the last time I remember skipping was Dec. 21, 2008.

 That day I skipped because I was filled with hope.  Hope because my 16-year old son, who was lying in a coma, was showing signs of  waking up – and I skipped through the lobby of the hospital waiting room to ICU.

 But he didn’t wake up that day. 

 And three days later he entered heaven. 

 We lived every parents nightmare, and Jesus has walked with us.

 He will walk with you through your heart ache too. 

 I skipped today because I have hope. 

 This story has a very cool PS—Sunday afternoon at a local restaurant, this couple struck up a conversation with a woman at a nearby table. In the course of the conversation, they were able to share their story with this woman, who was in need of hope. 

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My father left my family when I was 19. The pain and heart ache that I felt left me confused with emotions racing between suicide and homicide. I hated him and often felt an overwhelming self hatred for myself. And I continued to feel this way for the next two years until I was so beaten up by my cancerous anger that I developed a willingness to forgive.

So, I prayed everyday for three months for God to remove the hate from my heart and he did! However, when I approached my father with an excited, “I just want you to know that I forgive you,” it wasn’t as enthusiastically received. Over the previous two years while I had focused on hating my father, he had been equally angry with me and my isolation from him. I knew this because he responded to my forgiveness with, “You forgive me? I should be forgiving you!” I, at that moment, reclaimed my original feelings from God that I had so desperately asked him to remove and reverted back to where I began.

Several years ago, there was an interview on television of a journalist reporting on the death of a young man that occurred earlier that day in the D.C. area. When he had asked the mother of the young man to comment on her feelings toward her son’s killer she simply said that she had already forgiven him. The peace and serenity that came from her heart as she spoke was something that I wanted. I understood after hearing her heartbreak and her response to it that God wouldn’t support my hatred, but He will comfort my sorrow.

Since then, I’ve returned to my dad with a new willingness. This time I approached my father by taking responsibility for my wrongs and asking for the way to do right by him. At this point, God had revealed to me that I am forgiven and the importance of hearing my father admit fault was no longer as important as me telling him my part.

Today I have a new relationship with my dad and most importantly my God. My God, who has given me a peace and serenity within my life that I never thought would be possible.

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Fear,emptiness, hatred, unforgiveness, knew my life had no purpose. convinced of it, I  wrote to satan if I could marry this certain man he could have my soul…..I did…Later, had kids and was sad to think that I would never see my kids again after I died. I was driving down the road and this heat in my heart was so warm and loving…I knew that GOD had forgiven me for every sin.I cried and Knew God loves me!! Stopped at a church and asked Pastor Brian Severin tell me who is Jesus!!!!!! He Loves me!!!!  

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I grew up in a Lutheran church and was confirmed as a young girl.  My parents were not Christians. I had no personal relationship with Jesus Christ.  I used to sit outside at night as a young woman and look up at the stars and wonder what life was all about, and if there was something bigger than me.  After I got married, I was expecting twins and it looked like I might miscarry them.  That scared me.  I did deliver healthy babies, but after that I started attending church.  A church goer gave me some books to read, one  of which caught my attention: “Beyond Death’s Door.”  It told stories of people and their after-death experiences.  Some people went on to a pleasant light; others went off to a terrifying hell.  I didn’t know where I was going, and so I prayed the sinner’s prayer at the end of the book and received Jesus into my heart. This was around Christmas, 1980, and my life has never been the same!

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Any other stories out there you’d like to share? If so, email them to mystory@cccgreeley.org.

Boring Christianity?

The other night, I attended my sons’ band concert. One of the songs played was called “The Witch and the Saint.” The band director mentioned that the kids loved this particular song because of the loud percussion during certain sections. He was certainly right. During portions of the song, there was dramatic and thunderous percussion only to followed by a very sweet, melodious section.

As I listened, I found myself wondering–in the mind of the composer, which section represents the “witch” and which the “saint”? My hunch is that the saint was represented by the sweet melodious section and the witch the hard driving, energetic percussion. And that started to really bother me.

Why does being “saintly” always seem to be synonymous with a soft, peaceful, ‘elevator music’ approach to life? As author John Eldredge would ask, when did Mr Rogers become our model for the Christian life? Be nice and calm. Try to be good. Wear a sweater.

When did Jesus the Lion of Judah get domesticated in this way? To follow the King of Kings surely involves more excitement and energy and passion than being nice.

The other day my One Year Bible reading had me in I Chronicles–right in the middle of the section where all the tribes are being listed. Boring…at least usually boring. But this time, something caught my attention. In chapter 7, at the end of each listing of a particular line of descendants, the author added these words: “the fighting men in their genealogy numbered 22,600.” (I Chronicles 7:2) Then another: “They had 36,000 men ready for battle.” (I Chronicles 7:3) And another: “Their genealogical record listed 22,034 fighting men.” It goes on from there.

I started to think that maybe I should stop measuring church attendance and instead measure the passionate followers of Jesus–men and women–who are ready for a battle against the kingdom of darkness. That’s what we have been invited into as followers of Jesus–a battle for the rescue of souls from the prince of darkness. Sounds like an action movie, but this is real. It’s Christianity. Time to replace our “sweaters” with the armor of God.

I would love to hear a musical arrangement where the saints get the loud, energetic percussion of victory, and the witch gets the fading, lifeless melody of ultimate defeat.

Actually, one day we will hear that very arrangement–an eternal victory song for our glorious King. (a la Revelation 19). And of course, we can choose now to praise this incredible King of ours who has rescued us from the domain of darkness and invites us into the mission of setting the captives free.

Who said Christianity is boring?

Special Kindle Download Offer

Hey everyone

Just wanted to let you know that, for the next two weeks, Amazon is offering my book as a Kindle download for a special promotional rate of 99 cents. The book is entitled “Good News for Those Trying Harder” and offers a message of hope to weary Christians who are sincerely trying to see change happen in their lives but are growing frustrated in the process. You can read more about the book here:

If you know of anyone who might benefit from reading it, feel free to let them know about this offer. The promotional rate ends September 25th.

I just received an email from a man who had just read the book and put a review of it on his blog. Here’s a link to his review:

Does God Care About Las Vegas Buffets?

I’m sure that question got your attention. It’s actually a question I have been thinking about ever since a vacation my family took to California a few weeks ago. We were driving through scenic Utah (definite sarcasm here–seriously, I hear so many people complain about driving through Kansas, but at least when you drive through Kansas, there are actual towns every 30 miles. The stretch we were on between Grand Junction and Vegas–wow, it was desolate. Definitely don’t want to run out of gas there.)

Back to my initial train of thought…We had timed it so that we would reach Las Vegas around noon. I hadn’t ever been to Vegas but sort of assumed that daytime would probably be a more ‘family’ oriented time than evening.

Our first stop was the Gold and Silver Pawn shop–not that we frequent Pawn shops but we do watch Pawn Stars occasionally and wanted to actually be in the store where Rick and Chumley do their thing. Just so you know, the store looks much bigger (and cleaner) on TV than in real life.

After that experience, we then headed down Las Vegas Boulevard to see “the Strip” and to find a place to eat lunch. And not just any place. One of my sons had heard that Las Vegas buffets are awesome and cheap. So we were looking for a buffet, but I had no idea where to begin this search. On the strip, there were no signs advertising awesome and cheap buffets. Before I knew it, we had driven through the entire strip and had no lunch prospects on the horizon.

We had just driven past a few fast food places and were about to settle on one of those, so I turned the car around and headed that direction. In my heart, I was praying to God, “God, my son really wants to experience a buffet. I don’t know where to even start. Could you help me out here?”

I pull into a gas station to fill up and the minute I get out of my car, I hear this video advertisement playing on a screen just above the gas pump. “Lunch buffet at so and so place. Show your receipt and get one free adult buffet.” Awesome…and cheap! We headed to the location advertised and together experienced an official Las Vegas casino buffet.

So back to my initial question: Does God really care about answering a prayer like that? Some would say, no. In fact, I heard the other night on the radio a Christian DJ making fun of Christians who give God credit for stuff like that. The argument was basically, does God really care about piddly stuff like colors of couches, etc? At one level, it’s hard to not sound totally cheesy when attributing anything like that to God.

However, in my own heart and mind, I am absolutely convinced the answer to the initial question is a resounding Yes. God does care about buffets–actually it’s not the buffet He cares about as much as the fact that I was needing to find one. In the Lord’s Prayer, we are urged to call God “Father”. Abba. Daddy. If I, as an earthly Father, wanted to grant the desire of my son and let him experience a Vegas buffet, why wouldn’t my infinite God and loving Father be interested in helping me do just that?

Prayer is an invitation to experience a love relationship with God the Father. If He doesn’t care about the things that are on our hearts, in what way is He our loving Father? I’m not saying He always says yes to my request. But I am convinced that He delights in my asking and He delights in answering prayers like that. That’s what dads do.

Mom’s Graduation

My mom graduated last Thursday. She breathed her last breath on earth and immediately entered into the Presence of Jesus, tasting of life as she never dreamed possible. Her battle with cancer, which lasted for over two years, is ended….real life is begun. That’s what Jesus promises for all who trust in Him. I’m incredibly thankful for the hope of this promise, which brings significant comfort in the midst of the sadness we feel.

Yesterday we celebrated her life at a memorial service in Wichita. Hundreds of people gathered, all having been touched in some way by my mom’s generous and caring spirit. Over the past few days, my brother, sister, dad and I have been reminiscing about mom’s life and how blessed we were by her. We laughed together about how many times mom backed the car into parking lot poles–even when it was the only pole in the lot. We remembered how mom never met a stranger and could actively engaged in conversation with anyone. We remembered how, when mom would visit us, she could never just be a guest but was always up and around, wanting to help do something. When we would visit, she always had multiple snack/dessert/jello options for us to enjoy and spent most of the time making sure we were full and satisfied. My mom was constantly giving. That was her love language and she spoke it well. We will miss her.

One of the things I was especially thankful for was the advice given my by a friend about a month ago. As we were preparing to visit Mom in Wichita in early June, he said to me that one of his regrets, when his mom died a few years ago, was that he had not read to her before her death the tribute he had written about her. It is funny how we say so many nice things about people at their funerals but often don’t say those same things to them when they are alive. So I took his advice to heart. During our visit in early June, I had each of our kids, as well as Raylene and me, write Mom a tribute, expressing to her our gratitude and love for her as well as some of the memories that stood out in our hearts. Then, right before we left, we each read it to her. It was a really cool experience. That was the last time my children and Raylene saw Mom alive.

Later when I visited by myself to help my dad take care of Mom, I had another opportunity to say some things that were on my heart. At that point, I’m not sure she even heard what I was saying, but it felt important for my heart to say those things. “Say what you need to say”—that song has been going through my head this past month. Good advice. I’m thankful God gave me opportunity to express those things to Mom before she passed away. Is there anyone you need to let know how much you value and appreciate?

Daily Prayer Revised Version

I just discovered that there is a revised version of the daily prayer that I mentioned in the last post. It’s not significantly different but a few words have been changed and Scripture references are added. You can find it here

You can find many other prayers and helpful resources at John Eldredge’s Web site (www.ransomedheart.com)

If you would like an mp3 version of the Daily Prayer, you can download that here